Quarter Life is just a Hype.

I don’t know what is the big fuss about turning a quarter year old and why people are making it as if it is some kind of mark or checkpoint in life. While it is true that being 25 means that you are halfway in your 20s –you’re not getting any younger and you should be responsible for your actions– 25 is just a number. Life doesn’t tell you that “hey, you are already 25,  you should accomplish these things in order for you to be accepted to the next level”. This isn’t some sort of a Super Mario game. Life goes on after 25, whether I have met the expectations of the society or not.

I was once so obsessed about my own mental checklist. I have all these must-have’s and should-have’s by age 25, and guess what I haven’t ticked off even half of it, and I am perfectly fine. I realized we all have our own pace and timeline; what works for other people, might not work for me. So what if I get married at 40 or if I don’t get married at all. What if I never obtained my Masters degree just like what I hoped for myself by age 25. Does that mean I am not successful in life? Of course not.

I think the reason why we have a “quarter-life crisis” is because we put too much pressure in ourselves (aggravated by society’s expectation and social media) that we must accomplish something at a certain age or else, we will not be considered successful. Which is, if you ask me, such an awful way to measure success.

So take your time and don’t be pressured about timelines and age. You will get there in your own pace, in the right time. Here, let me just share the 25 things I have learned and the mantras that help me get by at 25.

 

  1. Success is relative. Celebrate little successes in life, not just the big ones.
  2. Don’t stress over the things you cannot control. Instead focus on what you can control, which is yourself, your thoughts and actions.
  3. Above everything else, love yourself.
  4. (follow up for #4) When you love yourself, you know your limits in the relationship. Do not give 100%, always leave something for yourself. Always.
  5. Being alone sometimes is good. It is good for your thoughts.
  6.  Forgiveness is never about the people who did you wrong. It’s about accepting what happened and giving yourself a peace of mind.
  7. We have different priorities. Respect other people’s priorities if they are different than yours. Same goes with opinions and beliefs.
  8. You don’t always have to pursue or make a living out of your passion, but you have to do something about it, cultivate it. Don’t let it die.
  9. We have our own pace and timeline, we are only in competition with ourselves, not with other people.
  10. Always try. Because it is better to deal with lessons learned than what ifs.
  11. If you are confused where you stand in a relationship, leave. Because a partner that is worth having won’t make you think twice about the relationship.
  12. Life has a way of giving you back what you have lost or missed if it is really for you.
  13. Leave your job if you are not happy with the job or the people around you.
  14. Mental health is as important as physical health.
  15. Life Insurance is a good investment while you are young. Don’t be ignorant about these things.
  16. Once a year, travel to a place you have never been.
  17. Love your parents and family. And always make time for them.
  18. College is one helluva ride, enjoy every single day of it. Make the most out of it, because you’ll miss it once it’s over.
  19. Plans fail. Life happens. Sometimes, when you think you have planned your future and you have decided the path that you would take, something always gets in the way. Be open to changes. Embrace changes.
  20. Do whatever you want to do, because you will get judged anyway. Just don’t mind the haters and focus on the people who love you.
  21. Miracles happen everyday. Don’t forget to thank God for all the blessings you have.
  22. Books, Coffee Shops, Travel, Food are some of the best things in life.
  23. As you get older, you will lose some friends and that’s fine. But if these friends would need your help along the way, don’t hesitate to extend a hand.
  24. You have control over your life. The way you think, the way you see things, the way you react — these are all in your control. Once you have learned this, you would realize how much power you have over your life. And it will become easier.
  25. Enjoy life. You are young. Spend time with your family. Have fun with friends. Take risks. Fall in love. Dream big. And always move. Do not be stagnant. Don’t be a bystander. Live your life.

 

Love, Andrea

 

 

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